While trying to expand my vocabulary about my identity, I came across the word bisect. Collins dictionary defines bisect – “to divide into two equal parts” (Collins English Dictionary, 1979), I identified with this word because it summed up how my bodies felt like two equal parts of one whole. I first used the term bisect in my second-semester study proposal during second year; I did this because I wanted to bring a new level of commitment by embodying being two equal halves of one whole. The increasing of my commitment felt both natural and necessary.
Although I wanted to commit to being a duo, I had my doubts about how Coventry University would support this decision. I specifically had issues about not meeting the criteria of the course – because of this, ‘bisect’ became more of an umbrella term that I used to define my work, more than a ‘brand’ for myself that stood for my commitment level.
At this point, I truly dissociated with being a collaboration of any description; I began to feel like the embodiment of bisect – two equal parts to one whole. Collaboration suggested individuals coming together and having distinct separations; however, my two bodies felt like they eliminated their original individual identities for a collective identity. Bisect felt very appropriate to use as a description of my identity.
I regret not being able to fully execute this concept of using the term bisect to define me. However, the fear and the lower level of commitment at the time meant I opted not to use this word to describe me. Instead, I began the year very focused on strictly adhering to the university brief as the fear of failure was more important at the time than fully realising my identity.